Mom's back was much improved yesterday. No muscle relaxer pill needed. I don't know if the pain was tension or detox. All i can say is, i'm just happy she's feeling better.
It is absolutely POURING here in Phila, so it may have been the Barometric pressure for all i know and had NOTHING to do with detox.
We took an hourlong walk yesterday at the mall and she did great.
We even went shopping afterwards. She's got tons of energy. I don't even think she notices how much more energy she has now since beginning the raw diet. For the last few months when she was super sick and miserable, she had little energy. The increased energy is phenomenol, but it's kind of like, i'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. So far, she has experienced little in the way of detox. I'm just wondering when she is going to, or IF she is going to. Perhaps I am not feeding her light enough to induce one? Nevertheless, Cliff even said yesterday, "She's like the energizer bunny!"
And I notice it more and more what nervous energy my mom has. At the mall, she could barely shut up for a second. She just NEEDS to talk and talk and talk, and she doesn't seem to run out of steam. So, i just let her. My dear mommy. I'm really cherishing this time with her.
Writing the blog on her is eerily morbid in a way, putting up pictures of her, and i hope not a foreshadowing of me losing her, soon.
Mom's voice was hoarse again yesterday. She also complained of heartburn for the first time. Nix the fresh squeezed orange juice for her from now on. I've NOT been following food combining for her AT ALL. (I never follow it). Gourmet raw in general does not. That's partly what makes it gourmet. But yesterday's "protein" shake snack for her, an "Orange Juliano" with hemp, banana, and fresh O.J., was the first meal to truly disagree with her. Duly noted.
Mommy came into my bedroom last night. As i was laying in bed staring up at her talking to me in the glow of the lamp, her skin looked particularly dewy and there seem to be less dark undereye circles. But, i couldn't escape also noticing how terribly drawn her faces looks. You can see the bones of her face.
I'm even tearing up as i write this now. I'm scared. I was crying last night to Cliff. I don't want my mother to die. I hope what i'm doing is right. I hope what i'm doing will heal her. But if she were on chemo or having surgery her appearance would be frighteningly worse. i should be thankful she is thriving so and just be grateful.
She's losing weight. She's already a twig. I don't know how to avoid her losing weight. She has a small appetite, it seems, on raw. I could feed her fattier things but i worry about her reflux. We eat about 5 or 6 times a day and her meals are not big meals, led by her appetite alone. And her appetite is not that big.
I'm basically feeding her a very very simple gourmet raw diet. Hell, a juice fast would be even worse - she would really become emaciated. She's not terminally ill, so i don't think a fast is warranted. And even 80-10-10, she'd lose even more.
Maybe i can make her more fattening pies and things to fatten her up.
Since she only has a benign polyp and 'questionable' tumors, maybe she's really OK on REGULAR RAW.
She is tolerating the diet exceptionally well. I was even shocked when she ate a 1/2 cup of mixed nuts - raw cashew, almond and raisins, and had no digestive discomfort at ALL from it.
Yesterday mom ate:
Pre BR: lemon water
BR: Green smoothie of spinach/mango/banana/date
SN: Chocolate maca banana hemp "icecream" over fresh raspberries with shaved coconut and pecan bits.
SN: Orange Julius shake: banana/hemp/OJ/vanilla
SN: A few raw mexican flavored crackers
LINNER: Mixed greens salad with "Jan's" Avo dressing; Brad's Raw Chips; one Raw Fruit/Nut "Larabar"
We are loving the Avo dressing. My dear friend, Jan, told me about it. I would have NEVER thought it would be good, but it is FABULOUS. And you are talking to a FAT FREAK here. I will pour olive oil on ANYTHING but this doesn't need it. This is how i do it. Mash up as little as 1/4 avo or use up to 1/2 for a big salad, add garlic, celtic salt, fresh lemon juice or raw vinegar or both, teensy bit agave, add water slowly until good dressing consistency. You don't need any oil. Smashingly delish. Mom loves black pepper on hers. I enjoy sprinkling nutritional yeast over as well.
SN: Strawberry icecream: banana/strawberry/agave
I ate similarly yesterday. She also snacks on prunes or raisins or dates in between.
Lots to do today. You know there'll be more tomorrow.
Write in. Let me know how YOU are.
I'm doing good. I still get tempted by cooked food, but so far so good. So does Mom, but we're hanging in there. Cooked food is COMFORT food. Raw food CAN be comforting, but NOT LIKE COOKED FOOD can. Raw food is healing food, mostly, i think.