"Is it all worth it?"

Howdy, Ya'll :-))

Today was a much better day. I felt pretty good overall, strange, since i was up since 3a.m. I guess that's because the night before i slept for 12 hours non stop. I think that's the detox kicking in. The need to sleep sometimes.

In the morning, I got all of the dishes done, cleaned and organized the kitchen and the refrigerator, did my vocal warm ups while doing dishes, sent out the Arnolds Way weekly email, did computer work for the Beckwith catering job (organizing, planning), answered a million emails, did some cooking for Cliff, worked on my opera, organized the laundry to be started. Walking into a clean kitchen feels SO good. Now, i just have to keep on top of it. Unfortunately, my cleaning skills are like my dieting skills. All or nothing. I have a hard time 'maintaining' a routine. Let's hope i can learn to keep up with it. It feels SO good to feel good. I hope i remember this.

At about 10:30a.m., after being up and productive for 7.5 hours, i went to sleep for 4 hours. When i awoke, i ate a little something and Cliff took me supermarketing for fresh produce.

I hadn't eaten anything at all until 2:30p.m. when i awoke. I had not been hungry AT ALL. I guess because i ate so much yesterday??? Nevertheless, I probably WOULD have eaten without hunger, but i wanted to wait since i hadn't pooped yet. After i pooped, i weighed in. More on that later.

For 'breakfast', i had noni juice and a big glass of barley green. For brunch at like 3:00p.m., i had 1/2 of a medium round watermelon while sitting outside in the luscious sunny breezy cool weather. That was blissful. I have such a taste for watermelon. I had bought 4 knowing i was going to go on a 'cleanse.'

According to my calories, i'm taking in over 3,000 daily, but under 10% of fat. This is actually very in keeping with 80-10-10. The only things i do that are non 80-10-10 are spices and garlic and vinegar, etc... I love those. They make salads tolerable. Rome was not built in a day. And frankly, i don't have to follow 80-10-10 perfectly. Thankfully, Doug Graham does not live in my home or head policing me. Fruit makes sense to me as energy food that's delicious and fat free. Greens make sense to me as energy, minerals and vitamins and roughage. Nuts provide a little oil and protein. I have no gas eating this way. On a high nut diet, i'm farting all of the time and have terrible reflux. On this, i have no reflux. Garlic and vinegar and herbs 'may' be destructive in his mind, but in mine, they're calorie free and do not hold up weight loss, so, i feel free to enjoy them. They will most definitely be in my "book" and people will start referring to my plan like they do 80-10-10!!!!

I didn't get to take a walk. I was busy, plus, i knew i had a very strenuous opera rehearsal tonight and didn't want to tire myself out.

The rehearsal went surprisingly well, but i sang out of the score. Vocally, i was so worried, but i kept telling myself to think positively and remember that one rehearsal i had where i didn't react emotionally and just did my best and i was fabulous. Apparently, this worked, as many said how fabulous i was. Go figure! However, i am NOT out of the woods. I have SO much to work on. The ENTIRE opera has to be memorized by next tuesday. Aaaarrrrghhh! Between blogging and emails and work and planning the Beckwith event and household chores and life...where will i find the time? Well, i just MUST.

I am so GLAD to be back on track with the food, as i apparently sang well and sounded very good. That's because with the 80-10-10 plan, reflux dissappears. I still weigh in the 250's, but reflux dissappears the minute i stop eating 'heavy'.

I still have heavy duty some problem spots in my opera role, my first aria was awful, but i'm on the right track, since i got LOTS of compliments from people i really respect! I'm singing with my friend, Eve Edwards and her husband Jeff! You'll remember her from the blog i did on her. She is FABULOUS. What a voice. I meant to get pics, but will next rehearsal.

I brought with me to rehearsal my liquid "lunch and dinner", a giant humongous enormous green smoothie, about 6 spaghetti sauce jars full. The bottle holding the smoothie was a liter or more, maybe 2 liters or 3. I filled up the entire empty xlarge value cranberry juice bottle with a rockin' green smoothie made of lots of bananas, at least 10 small, a little bit of almonds, some cacao and an entire xlarge bin of spinach. mmmm. it was primo. what a great recipe. i must remember this one!!!

Poor me, i weighed myself in at 2:30p.m. yesterday and weighed in at 256 1/4 from 266 1/2 three days before. I've only lost like 2 lbs since yesterday and nearly 10 pounds in 3 days... don't you feel sorry for me????? And i weighed in this morning, Wed morning at 255 1/4. Awwww, only another pound lost. I'm so dissappointed, i've only lost like over 11 lbs in 4 days. Does someone have a tissue???? snifff sniff...bbbboooo hoooo. [i'm not really sad, i'm KIDDING!]

Man, this watermelon thing is WORKING!!! :-))))))

So, was all of the irritability and "hunger" worth it? YES. I feel MUCH better today and was not hungry like i was yesterday.

Tonight someone i hadn't seen since january remarked, "Wow, you've lost even MORE weight!"

Ask me again if it's worth it. YES YES YES YES

2 big raw corn on the cob tonight, hungry! delish.

feel good.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

wed morning
i reconfirm, i feel good!!! i'm soooooooo happy to be almost the weight i was. it's amazing the power of 80-10-10 to reverse 5 billion nuts, tons of salt and 5,000 peices of raw living bread clogging up my system. i'm becoming convinced more and more that i'm totally on the right track!!!! can i keep this up, though????

for today i can. and i work today, usually a disaster in the making, but i will have to just do my smoothies, pre-make green smoothies for myself, eat veggie meals if i want, have a salad with tahini and garlic and lemon. i can DO this. i've done it before. and it felt free. i'm glad to be "back."

xoxo michelle joy