Sunday, December 18, 2011


So, i've been telling you that i get these daily emails. They are unbelievably powerful. To open up email and to be uplifted immediately is such a gift and a blessing.

Here is the one I got today from a website called Abraham-Hicks. My fabulous friend, Joy, told me about it and I signed up for it. I'm so glad i did. Here goes:

Start telling a better-feeling story about the things that are important to you. Do not write your story like a factual documentary, weighing all the pros and cons of your experience, but instead tell the uplifting, fanciful, magical story of the wonder of your own life and watch what happens. It will feel like magic as your life begins to transform right before yours eyes, but it is not by magic. It is by the power of the Laws of the Universe and your deliberate alignment with those Laws.
--- Abraham

So, this is exactly where i've been at. I mean, Pure Raw Joy used to be about staying raw, at first, and then, when i couldn't get back on raw, it was about how badly I was doing with blow by blow details and lots of hopeless out of control depressed discouraged feelings.

That's when i stopped writing, because i realized eventually, it wasn't helping me get any better to talk about how badly i was doing.

So, now, in my life, I've changed the focus from talking about and focusing on my woes with food...t0 focusing on changing my mental state and my language. My friend, Karen, who reads Eckhart Tolle has been so instrumental in helping me achieve this new focus. Thank you, Karen!

It seems to be helping, because even though my diet is not all raw, I am much happier! And a happier person can change, not one who feels she can't accomplish anything because nothing is within her control.

For a good example of how I'm changing my language and the impact it has, on friday at Arnold's Way, a former student, who was in one of my raw diet classes and who is normal weight but who has difficulty with out of control eating too, came up to me as I was making food, as we have met and chatted many times before, and she was telling me about all of the 'bad foods' she can't stop eating and I was listening, but in a different way.

I was now focused, for myself, on staying positive, only focusing on the positive things and do, and not lamenting over every negative thing I do. To hear her description of what was going on made me realize the issue is not really about the cookies she can't stop eating, the issue is really about how she views the cookies she can't stop eating. Do we obsess and focus on the negative? Or do we focus our minds on what we want and the good things we do? Which way works to produce success???

When she asked how i was, she expected me, as usual, to commisserate and have a similar sob story about my horrible struggles and lost battles with food, because it's obvious from my weight gain that i'm not losing weight, but i said to her:

"You know what? i'm finding that my attitude, and especially my language make all of the difference. I'm wanting to do well. That's my answer to how I am! And I'm focusing on the positive. I find that talking about everything i do wrong doesn't help change occur, it just makes me want to continue to do worse. Instead, I'm finding that setting intentions for what i want and focusing on those intentions really powerfully, really set my mind on them, really does seem to help me to create positivity and change."

I think she was really taken aback as it certainly wasn't the answer she was expecting. And other people heard, Arnold and Chloe and it made people happy and uplifted to hear such an answer. "You go, girl!" When we're positive, people root for us. When we're dragging in mud, telling everyone about it, they're all, like, "Uh, see ya later."

What was funny to me was SHE goes to all of those "The Secret" type seminars and used to say that stuff to ME when i was teaching the raw diet class!! It was just a really funny role reversal and ironic because i was the really fat one saying it, and she was the thin one not focusing on the positive.

She once said, "You know, it doesn't matter if you have 5 lbs to lose or 100, it can feel the same."

Anyway, in changing my attitude and language, i've been having good success during my imperfect days, which I've been latching onto, and then it helps me want to do better the next day, you know? For instance, in NYC on Wednesday, I walked 66 blocks. I also ate a cheeseburger, which would usually send me into a tailspin. Instead, I just keep getting back up, renewing my intentions, so i'm able to get back on track so much quicker. Even if i keep screwing up again. I was raw 3/4 of the day on both Thurs and Friday. Still, I bought a new bottle of vitamineral green. I started to take a blue green algae last night. And last night with Cliff, we water-walked together in my parents' clubhouse pool for 40 mins together. It was bliss! I didn't binge yesterday but also didn't eat all raw.

What i'm trying to explain is - by changing my attitude/focus, i'm recovering from setbacks much much quicker. Soon, if i keep this up, setbacks will be like nothing. And binge eating will be GONE. THIS IS MY INTENTION.

On Thursday night, something really great happened. I didn't think i could sing well. i was exhausted, i'd worked all day. I didn't have a great warm up. I just kept intending to do well and kept surrendering to God. "Help me, Lord. Help me!"

I had probably the BEST singing experience I've had since working again with Badiene. It was as if everything just FINALLY came together with my singing technique and I saw the light. I sang the Bach Cantata BWV 151 with the orchestra and the flutest said afterwards, "You are fantastic!" I am going to surrender to God alot more. He can help make my intentions reality!

It was interesting to note that while singing it was alot of WORK to focus on using my correct support and keeping my throat open (as I'm learning), but the hard work of singing correctly paid off . I felt like I could make any adjustment to the sound I wanted, quieter, diminuendo, crescendo. My voice was within my control.

Along the same lines, I'm finding that the more and more I set intentions and focus on the positive, the more my eating is in control.

Yesterday at my moms, i could have easily binged had i wanted to. Which i often do.

Yesterday I set an intention to eat what i wanted normally. And I did. I stayed focused and paid attention with each bite. I didn't LIKE that chicken wing. I wasn't going to eat another. It was new.

It's almost like miraculous how it happens.

So, I feel hopeful for the future.

Yes, intellectually, i "know" raw is the healthiest for me. But emotionally, i'm needing to learn this important flexibility that "food does not define me" and that "food does not control me." In learning that "I" control my attitude, "I" control my actions, "I" control my behavior, "I" control food, I'm making significant inner spiritual changes that feel really really important.

I talked the other day about how if we fall from our best intentions, we just have to keep renewing our intention and pick ourselves back up again and get back on track. So i had my smoothie this morning.

Maybe we have to do that 1x a day or maybe 25x a day. I think it's the most important thing right now for me to learn.

This is something i never learned as a serial yo yo dieter. With diets, I would make one false infraction and give up completely. This was the seed that birthed binge eating that I'm working on eradicating today.

_ _ _ _

So, I invite you to read and reread that little Abraham-Hicks statement above and give thought to sharing less of the blow by blow sob story of your life, but to start creating within your own life "the magial story of wonder." Start focusing on the positive. Start monitoring and changing your language to reflect a more positive you.

Let's transform our lives togeher in this way!

xoxo michelle joy

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