Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Finding YOUR Best Diet!

Hi there, Folks,

Things are going really well. I just looked at myself in the mirror and i'm so pleased how well my face is looking. The bloating is gone, i'm down at least 13.5 lbs in less than a week. I weighed myself 2 days ago and get weighed in again on Friday morning.

You know, cooking veggies and lentils is not as scary as i always thought it would be.

I had a really great 'ah-ha' moment last night in one of my bi-weekly conversations with Carlene, my mostly raw weight loss coach at She made a fantastic observation in labeling me a "fat and salt addict" - not coincidentally, JUST LIKE HER. And no matter the medium, cooked or raw, we're obsessed by fat and salt.


She's been able to break out of the stereotypical raw gourmet diet AND out of total 80-10-10 eating, to now incorporate some cooked into her high fruit low fat diet...ALL THE WHILE MAINTAINING her 140lbs weight loss. How does she do this??? By 'avoiding' fat and salt, PERIOD. She does indulge from time to time, but, overall, her diet is VERY low fat and VERY low salt. In that way, she's able to maintain control.

I suppose it's no coincidence we've linked up. I needed to come to this place, i think.

My most in-control non-compulsive raw times have been on 80-10-10. Well, it figures. No salt. Barely any fat. But i couldn't maintain the diet. It felt way too harsh to me. I invariably always broke free from it, and went back to extremely high fat, high salt raw gourmet binge eating.

Gourmet raw drives me NUTS it tastes so good. I have a hard time stopping. It's so high fat and high sodium that for someone like me who is just a BORN ADDICT, it's like asking an alcoholic to have a few glasses of wine and not want anymore. The high salt and fat just awaken this monster in me.

Cooked Vegetarian junk food like fried spring rolls, fried tofu in singapore rice noodles, cheese pizza, donuts, cheese and mayo on a boca burger - why do i like it all? The FAT and the SALT. And why can't i stop once i start? The FAT and the SALT.

My diet the past 5 days with the assistance of Carlene has been largely a Whole Foods 50% raw diet comprised of: very large servings of green smoothies several times a day, unlimited fruit snacks and meals (homemade applesauce, etc...), and cooked soups made with no salt or fat, containing mongo amounts of veggies, and little orange lentil beans. [i'm also walking an hour a day.]

I'm finding i'm totally contented. I'm back to being completely un-compulsive. I'm not back into the high fat/high salt cooked binge eating like i was (i swear, i feared i'd never stop). It's out of my system. I'm amazingly OVER it! [Well, one day at a time, God Willing!] I feel like an alky who's been to rehab. Without the alcohol in my system (high fat and salt), i just don't CRAVE it.

So, it really never was COOKING that made me so ravenously compulsive. It was FAT and SALT.

I'm so totally contented with this new diet, but Carlene and I both realize that in order to ensure i can stay on this plan (and drop all of my excess weight) (and stop binge eating), i will need some 'treats' of salt and fat. No more black and white dieting. It's time to live.

I'm thinking the best way to tackle incorporating a little salt and fat in my plan would be to keep this new routine (basically the Dr. Fuhrman plan) as my daily plan, but then when i go OUT, i allow myself small dabblings into salt and fat.

Carlene has cautioned me that i can NOT go above a certain point with the salt or the fat...otherwise...the cravings will return. She's given me a cut-off of 1800 cals total, 3,000mg sodium and 30% fat. If a food is very fatty and very salty, it just "shouldn't be in your repertoire, Michelle."

I really, really, really GET it. It's like...i SEE the light.

Salt and Fat for me...have to be monitored, avoided, eaten with great care.

Nothing really changed emotionally for me this last week. I just stopped ingesting my DRUGS. I'm so much calmer. Even Carlene noticed. "You're so much calmer!"

I feel certain i'm on my way to "finding my best diet!" I can eat really all the soup i want...getting as full as i like...[binge eaters are high volume eaters, plain and simple] but i lose weight like crazy. Cooked veggies and lentils are so low in calories you can get stuffed and not even take in 300 cals. I made a giant pot of soup tonight, worked up the calories and the entire BIG pot is less than 1,000 cals. On the other hand, 8 peices of raw bread score over 1,000 cals.

I'm finding even this plan preferable to 80-10-10. Though it's not all raw, i'm losing so much quicker. And i FEEL so much better. And i can get REALLY full. And hot soooooooo pleasurable. That's sooo important to me, a sensual being.

Here's a sweet note from my friend, Jan, who's been keeping track of me on my plan with Carlene. She is the one who introduced me to Carlene, as she was on rawfoodbootcamp herself.

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Hi there, Michelle,

...I'm so thrilled that you are happy with the program that you have settled on. Realizing that following Dr. Fuhrman's program with some cooked food is working for you and it's the fat and salt that are the problem is "a good thing" as Martha Stewart would say. I know you have told me ever since OHI days that you have a real problem not being able to stop with the high fat and salty foods. So, now, knowing that you can eat/have the cooked soup whenever you want and you find it warming, filling, and satisfying is a wonderful new part of your program. I am very, very happy that you have discovered this. And, as you expressed to Carlene, allowing yourself the small indulgence of being able to have a moderate amount of salt and fat whenever you go out with friends, is, I believe, an important part of living a balanced life, foodwise. Knowing that you have that meal to look forward to, but, also reminding yourself that it is "just a meal" and not an opportunity to over-indulge, can mean the difference between being black and white. Enjoying that "gray area" every once in a while can prevent one from rebelling against the rigidity of an all-or-nothing program!

I hope I am making sense. Just know this, Michie, that I support you on your journey and am happy when you're happy with your steps along the way!


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Jan is such a wonderful friend. She has been an enormous support to me and i'm so grateful for her friendship.

It's my hope that everyone suffering from binge eating or from issues with gourmet raw or displeasure with 80-10-10 or with morbid obesity can find peace and a plan that works for them. We all must find our way. We cant go on like we have been. We need to find something that WORKS for us. It's a rough road to tread sometimes, trying this and trying that, but just know...if I can do it, anyone can do it!!! Think back to what worked for you in the past. Through a process of trial and error, you'll find your way. But never forget you need support, until you are strong enough on your own!

I have much much greater stores of power and ability than i even realize. I really NEEDED Carlene's support in the throws of my 'disease.' But, i'm coming closer and closer to the realization that i CAN do this and continue this on my own. I can overcome binge eating. I can lose the rest of my weight. I can enjoy my diet. I can have discipline, and allow myself some freedom, within limits.

Even 50% raw....feels like PURE RAW JOY!!

xoxo michelle joy

1 comment:

Bodhisatva said...

How very inspiring! You've affirmed what I've believed and shared with others...find your path. I think raw is essential in everyone's diet, but not everyone can mentally and emotionally maintain "high raw" with 80%+ raw (including me!). The most important thing is to avoid "toxic" foods.

Way to go! We out here cheering for you!