Beginning Raw Vegan Weight: 425
Beginning Blog Weight: 277
Yesterday's Weight: 262 3/4
Today's Weight: 262 1/4
Loss Since Yesterday: - 1/2 lbs
Total Blog Loss: Almost 15 lbs in 5 days!
Only 8 lbs to go...to get back to where I was!!!!
Beginning Blog Weight: 277
Yesterday's Weight: 262 3/4
Today's Weight: 262 1/4
Loss Since Yesterday: - 1/2 lbs
Total Blog Loss: Almost 15 lbs in 5 days!
Only 8 lbs to go...to get back to where I was!!!!
Sometimes things get so bad, our moods become so depressed and we become so discouraged that we think they will never turn around. My progress this last week has proven, that with a little effort, a lot of support and positive action, even the bleakest situation can be reversed...in no time!
I am proud to report that I have been asked to sing at the wedding ceremony of Miss Angela Stokes and Mr. Matt Monarch http://www.rawunion.com/ at their 'Raw Union' Wedding Festival outside of Ashland, OR on June 21st, 2009!!
I'm very excited about the wedding! If anyone is attending the Wedding Union Festival, please let me know! LaSoprana@aol.com
Today was a hard day. I slept over my mom's last night and my mother irritated me in the morning, and that set my day off on a kind of an irritable track, I'm sorry to say. Add to that my period and probably detox, and i was more irritable than usual today. Work in a kitchen is always challenging, it can be quite stressful, but I was more irrittated than i usually am, today, and feel badly about that.
I succeeded, however, in not eating any fat or salt at work today, and did not even taste the dishes i prepared for the customers, a real no-no for any good worthwhile chef, but, in these trying times, i gotta do what i gotta do. I brought extra braggs out to the table in case i undersalted unwittingly.
I found it challening to keep track of everything i ate. It's not only a memory issue, but, an issue of being 'in touch' with myself, with my hunger/my emotions.
I think it would be best if i started a notebook to notate everything i eat at work from now on. This is a very important part of Fairburn's book, "Overcoming Binge Eating", and since work is probably the place where i most often stressed to overeat, naturally as i'm around food, my 'drug', handling it, smelling it, touching it...and a commercial kitchen can be very stressful, busy, so this makes it the most 'fraught with danger' location for me.
I felt raw emotionally today and very in need of comfort and nuturing, especially after work. I could not imagine taking my walk in the sudden chill of the air at 7pm. So, yoga class made the most sense to me in my emotional state, a nurturing and comforting and spiritually elevating choice. And I did feel better afterwards. Yoga is so cool. Talk about getting in touch. My favorite part of yoga besides the bicycle thing i can now do with my butt and legs in the air is when we do 'OOHMMMmmm' and we set our intention for the time together. It is so lovely.
Nevertheless, back to the food, in the grind of working, and without a notebook by me, I ate more than i have been. I found it very hard to be in touch with my hunger and being stressed and irritable, ate 'just because' more oftten.
Heck, a notebook is a tool. My goal is to be more in touch from the INSIDE ultimately. But a notebook will help. I also think meditation is something calling me again. I used to meditate daily and found self-control a wonderful byproduct of 'going inside'.
I said in yesterdays post that one cannot overeat fruit. Well, one can overeat DRIED fruit...!!! If there's a way to overeat something...i'll find it in a stressed state!!! Obvioulsy, I need to be more centered, much less emotional.
This was a hard day. My first day back to work without 'picking up' as they would say in AA.
On the ride home from work, i had no dreams of being on Larry King! In fact, i felt really silly about that, but I shouldn't. Dreams can never be silly. It's just disillusionment, discouragement that sometimes get in the way of our highest visions. I'll get back to dreaming about Larry!
Larry: "Caller, you say what?"
This was even one of those days where i was questioning my choice to stay on 80-10-10. I thought, "What, am i NUTS?" There is a field trip from Arnolds Way meeting soon at Matt Warner's new raw restaurant, "The Rainbow Garden" http://www.livefoodist.com/. I think it's coming in June sometime. I'll get the date. Anyway, Marvelous Megan, my coworker, who i adore, really talked up their taco salad. "The nutmeat on it tastes JUST like Taco Bell!" My mouth is watering thinking about it, but I guess it's going to be the squeeky romaine covered in strawberry sauce for me, instead!!!!
Although i did eat more than i have been, i had a another realization today that this was the right plan for me. It just 'feels' right as I'm SO MUCH more in control. I thought hard about it and realized that allowing myself to eat gourmet at work, to have 'free reign', i have never had a controlled day at work. Then again, i never have tried to work the 'binge eating' book in that state...
Nevertheless, at home, it's another story. I'll often have a gourmet meal, it may be too large, but it usually doesn't escalate to compulsive snacking. However, the restult is: I either don't lose any weight or gain weight, and i had other complications, anyway, from gourmet, i can talk about another time.
That infernal question hounds me, "Is it ME? Or is it the FOOD?" "Do i try to moderate myself with gourmet, or just give it up?
Perhaps i am going to just ride this out, day by day, and see where i go, where i want to go with the 80-10-10.
I know one thing, I am MUCH more raw emotionally on 80-10-10 with no fat, that is for sure! But, perhaps that is a really really GOOD thing. Time to clean things up on the inside, emotionally AND physically!
I'm going to have to learn how to be okay with that. How to cope without reaching for my sedatives: salt/fat.
Although i did eat more than i have been, i had a another realization today that this was the right plan for me. It just 'feels' right as I'm SO MUCH more in control. I thought hard about it and realized that allowing myself to eat gourmet at work, to have 'free reign', i have never had a controlled day at work. Then again, i never have tried to work the 'binge eating' book in that state...
Nevertheless, at home, it's another story. I'll often have a gourmet meal, it may be too large, but it usually doesn't escalate to compulsive snacking. However, the restult is: I either don't lose any weight or gain weight, and i had other complications, anyway, from gourmet, i can talk about another time.
That infernal question hounds me, "Is it ME? Or is it the FOOD?" "Do i try to moderate myself with gourmet, or just give it up?
Perhaps i am going to just ride this out, day by day, and see where i go, where i want to go with the 80-10-10.
I know one thing, I am MUCH more raw emotionally on 80-10-10 with no fat, that is for sure! But, perhaps that is a really really GOOD thing. Time to clean things up on the inside, emotionally AND physically!
I'm going to have to learn how to be okay with that. How to cope without reaching for my sedatives: salt/fat.
Br: 3 oranges, 3 grapefruit
Sn: large banana whip with frozen raspberries on top, yummo!
Sn: 6 whole medjool dates, God's candy, unreal, creamy, mmmm.
Lunch: 1 green smoothie and "Mumbai Spaghetti" - recipe below. i'm like SO into the Indian flavors lately. This was absolutely delcious. I just HAD to write the recipe out.
Sn: 1 med. container dried mango with chilli and lime - outta control they are so good. i ate the whole thing..., not a good idea and something i should definitely not get in the habit of.
Exercise: 1 hour YOGA class
Dn: 1 container mushrooms, sliced, with garlic, red pepper flakes, apple cider vinegar, cumin, agave, nutritional yeast sprinkled ontop. Not too yummy. But lunch? That was 'killer'.
MUMBAI SPAGHETTI- 1.5 large zucchini's spiralized in bowl
In cuisinart with S blade, add veggies and whir up a spicy sauce:- 3 or 4 Roma Tomatoes, quartered- 1/2 red pepper, sliced- 1 large clove garlic, sliced- 2 slices fresh ginger, diced- sqeeze of fresh lemon/lime
Pour sauce over spaghetti.
Shake the following spices/seasongings on top of sauced noodles:- 5 shakes turmeric- 1 squirt cayenne juice- 3 shakes coriander- 5 shakes chili powder, salt free, Frontier brand- 2 Tbsp nutritional yeast
Blend and mix up with your fork and enjoy!
Barely any salt/fat...and sooo yummy. When food is spicy enough, you forget there's no salt or fat. Nutritional yeast has only 1 gram of fat and 5 mg sodium
per 2 Tbsp serving. 2 Tbsp of olive oil have like 30 grams of fat... Nama Shoyu has like 900 + mg of sodium per serving... I keep citing that, i know.
xoxox
Michelle joy
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