I've been meditating and it's calmed the food compulsions. Pretty amazing. Yesterday was the first time i ate - in days - when i wasn't hungry. (Not a great accomplishment, but being aware of it was new.) Eating when i wasn't hungry ticked off the binge impulse and I ate a meal after that which i was not hungry for, but it didn't turn into a binge. Somehow i'm calmer, more rational. I'm convinced the meditation is JUST what i need right now and is helping me.
Mom still wants the surgery, but she's putting it off until after my cousin's wedding on May 2nd. Some time to breathe.
Susan and I are meeting again today to plan more for our 2 raw catering jobs. We just realized the one for 200 people will need much more food than we've ever made. I must really center myself to stop from freaking out. The last raw catering job we did for 200 took us an entire week to prepare for - that was a one hour event and was finger foods. You have no idea the amount of labor that goes into making the raw food for that event. This job will not be hors d'euvres, but a full dinner, for many hours. Pray for us.
My voice is not too hot. With the allergies and singing over a cold several times, i'm scratchy and irritated in there. I'm also getting my period. I'm so scared. I have to sing the opera again on Sunday and I'm nervous because the day after i rehearse for the Jewish Heritage Concert, and then that Friday is the concert. Just WRITING all of this i feel nasious. Wish me luck! It's better for me to acknowledge it....but KEEP CALM AND CENTERED....!!!
Meditation, rescue me!
xoxox michelle joy
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
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