"Embrace Health 2010" Meeting in Glenside, PA with Patti & Tom Lombardi

I was invited to a very nice talk in Glenside, PA, last night given by Patti "the Veggie Coach" and Tom Lombardi, called "Embrace Health 2010." In about a week, their website http://www.embracehealth2010.com/ will be operational. I'm looking forward to that.

The topic of the evening was embracing a WHOLE FOODS DIET. This was a general audience, yet much ado was made of the RAW VEGAN DIET, citing how healthy and beneficial it is. Patti and Tom have visited the cafe' where I am one of the chefs, Arnold's Way Raw Vegetarian Cafe', and spoke of Arnold many times in this talk. Patti and Tom are not raw foodists, yet they eat a high degree of raw in their diet and eat minimal processed foods. They shop the outer isles of the market!


Patti, known as "The Veggie Coach" spoke of the many benefits of eating raw greens, the dangers of processed foods, and the importance of mindful eating, as well as her family's diet history. Patti and Tom's family went from eating a fast food diet to a WHOLE FOODS diet with barely any processed foods. They all feel so much better.







Tom Lombardi spoke of losing our judgement about food, entering into a state of CURIOSITY about how we feel, how what we eat affects us, trying new ways of being, really pushing the limit in 2010 and changing our diets in the extreme. Tom mentioned many times OBSERVING ourselves as one of the number one keys to changing. By just WATCHING what we do..and taking internal notes...the spirit and the body will guide!




Books compatible with the raw vegan diet, the vegan and vegetarian diet were on display. Tom and Patti mentioned that the WHOLE FOODS DIET is what they are ALL based on. It just makes GOOD sense. I don't know if Patti and Tom eat meat, but they talked extensively about how giving up dairy impacted their lives in the positive. Tom's running went into high geer as soon as he gave up dairy. Suddenly, he had abounding energy! The bulk of their family diet is made up of greens, veggies, fruits, nuts, seeds.



All participants were asked to bring a bag of chopped veggies for our homemade "salad bar." It was quite lovely!













"What are you looking for?" was asked. The answers sound like what EVERYONE wants: Energy, support, weightloss, trustworthy info, a healthier lifestyle, less stress, eating consciously, and a healthier family!







Processed Foods are lacking nutrition and enzymes, the body can't process them, they add toxins to the system, and lack substance.

Plant-based foods, however, fill us with chlorophyl, nutrition, fiber, water, protein. We get it ALL from plants...just like many animals do!












A nice crowd enjoyed the talk...and the salad! Here are some of the participants chatting at the end of the session.








For dessert, we all enjoyed clementines eaten "consciously," using all of the senses. We took time eating the fruit - Paid attention to the wonderful perfume spritzing off of the peel and how the peel felt against our skin - Enjoyed the vibrant orange color of the peel - Felt the squirt of the juice as our teeth bit down on one section. MMmmmm... Mindful eating is something i will be focusing on.

More on that later....

xoxox michelle joy

Effortless Effort!

It's been a wonderful two days....! I don't quite know how they happened. They just did.

On Friday, Cliff drove me to work as it had snowed. We had shared raw breakfast, and then at work, i was busy and occupied and really peaceful and happy and not thinking about or obsessing over food for most of the day. It felt like a burden had been lifted. I don't quite know WHY or HOW that happened. It just did. I enjoyed raw meals in the raw kitchen at Arnolds Way, where i work.

Friday evening, Cliff picked me up from work. We shared raw dinner together and watched a movie together, and i had no compulsive feelings for food that evening. Lovely togetherness may be helping things, too, i suppose!

Cliff has been doing so well with raw the last few days. He's lost 7 lbs overall and is wonderfully supportive and committed to eating mostly raw. It's been cradling for me. Thank you, my darling.

Today, my honey and I were a terrific duo once again. We spent almost the entire day with each other, and it was so wonderful. It was a mostly raw day.

Here's my food report from today:

Br: Green Smoothie: green leaf lettuce, banana, apple, agave, water

Lu: Raw Car Picnic: mixed raw plate in the car in South Philly made from Igloo contents -
-slice of carrot 'living bread' slathered with 1/2 avo with celtic salt, lime, garlic
-1/4 of a tomato
-cabbage slaw
-marinated mushrooms
-1 of my world famous chocolate bliss balls.

Cliff and I eating together in the car is such a delight. I thoroughly enjoyed this meal and did not feel compulsive in the least!

DRINK: cup of cammomile tea with honey* (not raw honey) in South Philly at a sweet coffee shop full of characters

DRINK: cup of earl grey with honey* (not raw honey) in an area near 5th & Girard called "The Piazza" in Northern Liberties section of Phila.

Sn: leftover green smoothie. Felt hungry.

Dinner: Felt hungry! Mixed raw plate, our favorite kinds of meals these days -
-slice of carrot 'living bread' with the same mixture (avo, lime, salt, tomato)
-marinated mushrooms
-plop of zucchini spaghetti with delicious raw tomato sauce
-cabbage slaw
-my own homemade sauerkraut
-few dehydrated zuchhini bites (zucchini, tomato, italian cashew 'cheeze')
-chocolate hemp milk* (not raw)

Dinner was such a delight. I was hungry! But i restrained myself from picking preparing our dinner plates. Eating while hungry felt so TRUE and REAL. It was hard to restrain myself prior to sitting down, but i did it and felt empowered.

I insisted Cliff turn off the computer so we could share a dinner together. So much of the wonderful feelings these past two days was shared between the two of us. Why shouldn't we continue this onto meals at home and actually eat TOGETHER, sitting at the table, without distractions? What made lunch so special in the car was the togetherness, and how eating raw until satisfied makes you feel pleasantly full, energized and ready to go out and have fun, instead of feeling weighted down and tired and compulsive. It was so lovely. We're so in love these past two days.

We are not regular prayers, but spontaneously I said a prayer before eating, which Cliff finished, thanking God for the raw food and asking for his support for our diet and our love, which made the meal feel special and sanctified. All meals should be so.

We ate at the dining room table and chatted, and it felt so wonderful and like a BALM for eliminating compulsive eating - actually connecting with my honey during a meal, instead of feeding my face in secret, and connecting to a higher power, and staying attuned to my feelings of hunger/fullness/satiety/satisfaction....were all practices in CONSCIOUS EATING. And it felt good!!!!

The dinner plate also included such wonderful tastes, salty, sweet, sour. We both expressed feeling so satisfied and missing nothing on our plates.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Tonight I went to a healthy eating meeting that a friend of mine from Arnold's Way invited me to. We were all asked to bring a small bag of fresh cut veggies to create a giant salad for the group to share, and we all enoyed a lovely talk on the benefits of greens, of veganism, and the dangers of processed food. We had time for sharing and I had some wonderfully supportive sharing with my friend, Valerie, who suggested i go to the meeting with her.

I'll tell you about it more tomorrow.

Sn: at the health talk - plate of cucumber, cherry tomato, carrot, almonds, sunflower seeds. Not hungry, but decided to eat.

DRINK: Hot chocolate with my honey made from hemp milk, raw cacao, agave and some regular milk * (not raw) Not hungry, but desirous of something creamy and comforting and warming.

I'm going to be working on mindful eating more than anything else. I'm becoming more and more and more convinced that THIS will lead me to stopping binge eating. If i eat cooked or if i eat raw, i don't really much mind, as long as i stop binge eating! How this will all form remains to be seen. I felt delighted with the way today turned out!

Isn't it funny? I give myself permission to eat cooked, and consequently eat almost entirely raw! On the other hand, days when i try to white knuckle not binge eating gourmet at work end up in total disaster, stuffing my face. But on Friday, i didn't even THINK about what i was going to eat and ended up hardly thinking of food!

On the topic of binge eating, I had something not raw today (hemp milk and milk and not raw honey) and it didn't MAKE me binge. So, i don't think it's COOKED FOOD that MAKES me binge. I think it's how i THINK about cooked food that makes me binge. And it's how i THINK about GOURMET RAW food that makes me binge. It's being disconnected. It's eating automatically. At the meeting, the leader talked about "6 seconds of pleasure, 24 hours of suffering." I could really relate to that. Binge eating, i just ZONE OUT. It's like i'm not even THERE.

But, oddly enough, on these last vegetarian binges, i was really tuning in somewhat. And in doing that, i was all of a sudden able to make better choices. Kind of miraculously.

A BIG topic tonight was AWARENESS and BEING NON JUDGEMENTAL and BEING CURIOUS and just WATCHING OURSELVES. There is HUGE power in that.

I've asked the woman who led the meeting tonight to possibly coach me. She is a vegan who eats high raw and practices mindful eating. It feels like a good fit, and an answer to a "SECRET" attraction as i've been searching for someone to help me. With her focus on AWARENESS, MINDFULNESS and EATING FOR HEALTH and eating HIGH RAW, it felt like a wonderful fit and i'm feeling hopeful for the future!

More tomorrow!

xoxo michelle joy

E3Live, Feeling Good, Binge Eating, Cooked Food, and Weight Gain

Hi there,

Today was a work day at Arnolds Way Raw Vegetarian Cafe and Education Center in Lansdale, PA. I am one of the raw chefs there.

It was such an odd day, but don't get me wrong, i LIKED how odd it was!

Well, the sad truth is, I've been doing poorly the last few days with my food, so you would think I would have felt awful at work today. But i didn't!

When i got to work, i said to Arnold's daughter, Maya, "Maya, look how fat i got" and grimaced and patted my now chubbier cheeks. "I can't tell!," she exclaimed, "you don't look any different." Huh? I've gained, geez, at LEAST 30 lbs, it's entirely shameful to admit, but that is the sad truth. So, i went up to Arnold and said the same thing, "i gained so much weight, can't you tell?" "No," he confessed.

Wow. It is absolutely MOST apparent, but, uh, not fearing i looked like a grotesque monster started off my day pretty well.

It had already had a very rocky start.

I had awoke at 4am, and finally finished reading Victoria Boutenko's "12 Steps To Raw," a very good book, not a GREAT book, but a GOOD book, that i had started just a few days ago. Something seemed to relieve in me after reading that she recommends that people eating cooked food transition slowly into a fully raw diet and that they make a fully conscious decision only after WEEKS of drinking many, many green smoothies. Something about this statement made me feel that cooked food maybe wasn't so terrible after all, and that if you were "IN" it, it may or very well likely "SHOULD" take a while to work yourself "OUT" of it.

You see, unfortunately, i went off of my raw diet, again. Just to backtrack, i was 3 years raw, then began eating beans, experimented with the Fuhrman diet (Dr. Joel Fuhrman), then eventually began binge eating on cooked vegetarian food, only to go back to raw for 20 days, to go off of raw again to continue binge eating on cooked vegetarian.

So, with all of this binge eating, you would think i feel absolutely AWFUL. I am FATTER, yes, i don't like that at ALL. I don't like the way i LOOK, but i feel actually really GREAT!

There are a few things i attribute feeling good to:

1) SOME small successes in eating cooked food intuitively and noticing hunger/fullness and eating cooked meals that i 'wanted,' for instance, a Boca Burger instead of pizza when i felt i wanted the burger. And ordering more wiseley with an eye to what would be TOO filling, etc... For instance, NOT ordering the fries, too, which are at least 1/2 lb of fries, but got a 2 oz bag of chips instead. There has been some MILD but VERY SIGNIFICANT empowering feelings in actually being able to CONTROL my intake during a binge.
2) E3Live
3) Betaine HcL

E3Live and Betaine are two supplements I have been taking. Cliff and I have been taking the E3 Live for about 2 weeks now and, wow, i REALLY feel some SERIOUS benefits from it: High energy even when binge eating (!), excellent digestion even when binge eating (!), reduction of reflux laryngitis even when binge eating (!). I suppose the green fluid is alkelizing, so even with eating bread and cheese and icecream, etc..., i am receiving alkelizing benefits from the bluegreen algae routine. We've been taking 1 Tbsp once a day and for the last 3 days, we doubled the dose. Ideally, i'd like to take 3 Tbsp a day, 1 Tbsp with each meal. God, if i feel good NOW, can you imagine how good i'll feel THEN??

The Betaine is a digestive enzyme i've been taking for years now. I LOVE it. I cannot eat nuts and digest them without it. Apparently, it is helping TREMENDOUSLY with the digestion of pizza and boca burgers and fries and fried onion rings even. Wow.

So much for pure raw joy!!! Jeez, well, all i can say is, no one is perfect, and i certainly am seriously flawed and still in the midst of fighting my terrific food addiction and this is all part of my journey, so for me, it's valuable to document it all, because in documenting it, i can be a bigger help to people when i do finally come to terms with myself and discover exactly what DOES work for me.

Anyway, in case you are interested in the supplement, here is some info: www.e3live.com

E3Live® is 100% Aphanizomenon flos-aquae (AFA for short) that is an all-organic wild-harvested aqua-botanical considered by renowned health authorities to be nature's most beneficial superfood.

Physiologically, E3Live® helps restore overall body/mind balance in numerous ways. Its field of action simultaneously includes the immune, endocrine, nervous, gastro-intestinal and cardio-vascular systems.

Nutritionally, E3Live® provides 64 easily absorbed vitamins, minerals and enzymes and has more biologically active chlorophyll than any known food. It is the most nutrient dense food known to mankind.

E3Live® is a gift of nature, a miracle food.

So... okay, so, here i had this absolutely lovely productive day at work where i didn't even compulsively EAT!!!!, and do you know what i ate for breakfast? Uy, you don't even want to know - two Dunkin' Donuts eggwhite veggie flatbread sandwhiches with an order of hash browns and a cranberry juice. And i really felt GREAT all day despite this cooked vegetarian overeating episode, thanks to the supplements i'm taking.

I felt SO GREAT and so HAPPY at work today that after work, i actually went to the GYM and took a 30 min walk on the treadmill! I'm not sure what to attribute this wonderful happiness and mental lightness to, as i've been quite depressed, gaining weight, binge eating.

One reason for the feeling of relief could be that i canceled some classes that were to take place at Arnold's Way that i was severely stressing over, and in fact, only 3 people signed up for, not enough interest to make teaching the classes worth my while. Letting go of them was a huge stress reducer for me as it turns out.

Another reason for the lightness is i've been singing. And practicing. That is obviously STRESS RELIEVING for me. Boutenko talks about the benefits of relieving stress in controlling one's eating and, uh, it is certainly true. I'm auditioning for a new singing job this weekend. I'll update you more on that soon.... Wish me luck!

Also, ADMITTING openly and TALKING to many customers today about my diet, "I've gained weight due to eating cooked food compulsively...do you eat cooked food? What percentage?" (Everyone i talked to does.) ALot of the SHAME of weight gain and the SHAME of COOKED FOOD was relieved today merely by being out in the open.

I'm not even saying where i'm at is GOOD, it just IS, and being OPEN about it helps ME to move forward.

So, at the gym, i felt very empowered. There i was doing something good for myself despite a binge in the morning. That is such a wonderful feeling to actually turn a day around! Working at Arnold's Way was such a blessing today. I felt grateful to be there and enjoyed my day very much.] So, i was finished walking on the treadmill, i caught a glimpse of myself in the window and no, i didn't like what i saw. And i said to myself, feeling quite empowered, "I would like to get back to the 250's. I don't like how i look in the 280's."

And then i said to myself something shocking. "Make a list for yourself of all of the cooked vegetarian foods that you've been binge eating on that you obviously LIKE. MAYBE you CAN learn to eat them in moderation."

As i write that now i know how foolish it sounds. Me and Moderation are not close friends.

BUT, what this FREEDOM of thinking this way gave me was the actual POWER to think about going on a green smoothie fast. Like, i can STILL have cooked food AFTER if i WANT it.

I know, it sounds nuts, but mentally it's working for me.

I also bought Victoria Boutenko's new book, "Green Smoothie Revolution," and i'm thinking after the green smoothie fast that i will eat 1 cooked vegetarian meal a day, plus green smoothies.

The smoothie fast is to help me get back to a more comfortable weight. I know, i know i endlessly talk about how destructive dieting is. But, you know what? i don't like the way i look. And that's that.

That's what my THOUGHT is now, but, as you know, those change DAILY!!!!

That's where i'm at today and i'm stickin' to it....at least until bedtime tonight!

So, i hope you are all well. I hope you all are finding your way successfully. And i'm sorry i'm struggling and not able to be a shining light in the raw community anylonger. But, maybe i can still get back there. But, sometimes, by TRYING so hard, one makes things more difficult than by just "letting go" and "letting GOD." If raw is right for me and where i and my body need to be, i'll get back there!

xoxo michelle joy

"O DEM GOLDEN SLIPPERS!!!" NEW YEARS DAY IN PHILADELPHIA!!

Hello friends :-))

Time sure flies...I can't believe it's already Jan. 4th!

Cliff and I had such a blast at the Mummer's Parade held annually here on New Year's Day in Philadelphia that we wanted to share some pictures with you.

The Mummers Parade is something you MUST visit at least once in your life! We were so dissappointed to have missed the comics, but were blessed to see every string band parade down the street. And hearing a Mummer's stringband live? Simply astounding. In the words of one strongly Philadelphia-accented South Philly parade goer, "Dare ain't nuttin' like it!"

What a fantastic day!

If you're super interested in the history of the Mummers, here's a very cool article http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mummers_Parade

Enjoy! And happy new year!







Women used to not be allowed to parade, so themes often include parodies of women.













This is a shot of "Fralinger String Band", the winners this year in the String Band division and past winners for many, many years!










That's me with the banjo player!











This is where the judging takes place now, in front of the Union League on Broad Street. Many attendees were smart to bring ladders and chairs and step stools to place on the sidewalk so they could actually SEE the bands performing for the judges! We were not so forethinking....







The Union League is actually a private and very exclusive club in Philadelphia. You must pay large sums of money to be a member. The building is enormous and elaborately decorated inside. I've been lucky enough to be invited to parties inside twice. Simply first class!










The amount of people at the parade was astounding! It felt so special to be a part of it! Lots of Philadelphia Pride on this day! Everyone is smiling and happy. There is so much love!








Two sexy wenches and me! This is the typical costume one thinks of for the comic division. Golden Slippers, of course, dresses, umbrellas and painted faces doing the Mummers Strut, a dance where you pump your arms to "O dem golden slippers", you feel a ton of pride and just feel marvelous!











My Cliffy and me at the parade! I'm wearing my new hat that my singing student, Shannon, gifted to me for Christmas! She KNIT it! Isn't it fantastic?











Headmaster of the Fralinger String Band!











This was a lucky moment!













Cliff in front of the winning band!













This was one of my favorite string bands although i don't know the name of them. They were dressed like indians. Look at those colors!










Women are now allowed to parade in the various clubs. What beautiful costumes!












There's those golden slippers!















Another comic wench!

Talk about colors! These outfits looked like Russian or Polish royalty, amazing.

What do we have here, wizards and witches?

Look closely at this ringleader's face. He's a lion!

And here is the band. These costumes were outstanding. Or were they leopards?

One of my favorite costumes!

Ole'! A bearded Rachero woman sax player, beaming Philly pride!

Three Amigos! Can you imagine having to carry those instruments for literally 10 hours at least??? Philadelphia's Mummers Parade is the longest parade in the entire country, beginning at 9 a.m. and not ending until well after midnight!

Fantastically colorful! But the music? Even better!

A female accordianist!

Love this picture and all of the frills on these costumes!

I spotted this Mexican clown on the street.

Next year we'll have to get to the parade even earlier to catch the clown division. They are a favorite. The clowns are all inibriated and do the mummers strut with such joy and happiness!

The mummers work ALL YEAR to prepare for the parade. Only a few short days after this parade, they'll begin preparing for next year.

Here's my Cliffy. He insisted we go to the parade this year as we haven't gone in several. What a treat it was! I should listen to him more often...

One of the first stringbands we saw and heard. Amazing!

Three more wenches!

xoxoxo michelle joy

HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2010!

I wish each and every one of you a very happy, healthy, and raw....new year!!!

Cliffy and I drank wine as the ball dropped last night after we got home from Arnold's New Year's Eve Party, and made our resolutions to each other, verbally. Mine was to exercise more. And we both expressed similar desires to make more money in this year, stick together on our raw journey, continue to get the house in order, and continue to love each other. He even said that maybe we'd get married this year :-)))

The last two days have been party days with my Arnold's Way crowd. It has been so nice!

Wednesday night was a send off party for our Arnold's Way friend and sometime-employee, Rachel Costello, who got a temporary job in Boston, teaching Spanish, yay! My friend and coworker, Megan McDonnell, the genius behind my new organized home, made a fabulous raw party for Rachel. Since i'm so food oriented, i love to talk about food, so i will! Megan made fresh papaya slices, guacamole and salsa with crudite, zucchini spaghetti with her famous basil mint avocado sauce (really light and really yummy), her famous banana pudding for dessert, and i brought a cranberry strawberry pie that everyone loved. (I'm getting super good at pie making!)
Eating raw food with friends is sooo wonderful, and we all wish Rachel all of the luck in the world on her new venture, and hope to see her soon!

I feel so blessed to be a part of Arnold's Way. It's such a special place. Remember the TV show "Cheers"? That's what it's like at Arnold's Way. A big happy family.

And last night Arnold hosted a fabulous Raw New Year's Eve Party at his home in Lansdale, PA. The turnout was great, and the food was even greater. I made a Thai Broccoli Salad and a pudding i call Rocky Road as it is chocolately with raisins and nuts and reminds you of the icecream, both huge hits. Leslie Arnold brought the MOST amazing "asparagus avocado" soup, whose name did not send me reeling, but once i tasted, oh my god, i had 2 cups, it was a divine elixer! She also made an awesome chocolate pie. Megan made something she called 'macaroni and cheese', which is short macaroni shaped zucchini 'noodles' in a cheezy sauce, and it really DOES remind you of mac 'n cheese by capturing the creamy, cheezy, salty essence of the dish. Stephanie Schneibel made fabulous marinated mushrooms. Carlos and Shakaya brought fruit. Arnold made green smoothies and a coconut fruit dessert. Karen Wilson brought a to-die-for kale salad using my Thai dressing that she bought at the store. What an inspiration. THAT is going to be the new special at Arnolds Way! Delish! Why didn't i ever think to put it on Kale???

Having these wonderful parties is making staying raw so much easier.

It's 18 days for me and Cliff that we have our raw kitchen at home and that we've been eating raw together at home. I've been 100% raw. Cliff is, however, doing the best he can, and i give him a LOT of credit. He will teach himself what makes him FEEL the best.

Yesterday we had green smoothie for breakfast. He dropped me off to work and i made him a chocolate whip and packed a raw 'chez burger' for him to take with him. He gladly ate that around lunch time, but around dinnertime as his live-in chefess was at work, he succumbed to a Philadelphia Cheesesteak. He said it tasted delicious going down, but felt like lead in his stomach afterwards. At the new year's party, he enjoyed a small portion of some of the savory dishes, but didn't have much appetite.

Last night, he did NOT sleep well, which i attribute to the cheesesteak. Eating heavy cooked food and meat makes you sleep like shit. You're body is busy digesting, not sleeping. So, he will teach himself what makes him feel the best. You can lead a horse to water...as they say!

I haven't weighed myself since last week and so i'm really unsure if i'm gaining significantly or insignificantly, or if i'm just holding steady. I'd like to think i'm in the low 270's, but i don't know and i kind of don't want to know. Maybe i'll weigh myself in a few days.

I had previously gained weight from binge eating for an entire month cooked food, and i've not lost that. That was a big emotional challenge for me to get over, the impulse to lose it FAST! But i realized that everytime i lose it fast, i gain it right back.

I wanted to try a new approach. Just eating more intuitively and having the bulk of my diet be gourmet raw dishes to appeal to me and my sensual nature, and to my meat and potatoes eating man. So, we drink green smoothies, and for meals have various salads with dressings, small amounts of nutspread on veggies or crackers, small peices of raw pie. We try to keep the portions on the small side since we're eating richer raw food. Sometimes we have homemade raw buckwheat cereal with raw milk. Sometimes we have raw cheese on flax crackers.

I often overeat, but i've stopped binge eating due to this new 'free' way of eating. No rules.

I must say one VERY important thing. Everyone who reads this blog knows i continually lost control severely with raw gourmet food when i would work at Arnolds Way. Well, during the week at home, i was 80-10-10ing, so all of the gourmet temptations at work were too hard for me to pass up, and i would go literally hogwild.

Well, since i've been eating gourmet at home, making flax crackers at home, making raw cereal, making raw pies weekly, the insane compulsion to binge at Arnolds Way is GONE. I marveled at my composure yesterday with the food there. When i was hungry midmorning, I ate several flax crackers for brunch before realizing i didn't want anymore. That THING that DRIVES me was gone. THAT is a new place to be and feels incredible.

I still OVEREAT, i VERY MUCH do, BUT, there is a HUGE difference between binge eating and overeating. Binge eating is continuous, frenetic, out of control, secret, frightening, huge quantity. To be experiencing relief from binge eating is filling me with insane levels of gratitude to be on a path that is making me more comfortable with food, that is making me feel more at peace with food. I know the work i do NOW will pay off in the future.

Obviously, my goal is to be a thin raw foodist who doesn't binge, but since dieting never relieved me of binge eating and only exaserbated it for me, I don't think more dieting will get me there. At least that's not my intuition at the moment. I think the path INWARD is going to heal me. Making peace with fattier foods at all meal times is taking the charge out of them. No binge eating necessary.

Gourmet raw may not be ideal for weight loss, especially when overeaten, but in small quantities with significant exercise, one CAN lose weight eating gourmet raw with the right attitude and belief in it. I never believed i could lose weight eating gourmet, because i always binged on it, but i think my viewpoint might change the more control i gain. Two friends of mine were BIG weight loss winners eating gourmet raw. My friend in Colorodo, Dutin, lost 100 lbs that way, www.dustinkellogg.com as did Tim Arnold.

"No deprivation" is Tim's motto, and i'm beginning to see why. It takes the charge out of binge eating to actually ALLOW yourself to eat well all day.

In Dr. Christopher Fairburn's book, he explicitly states it is imperative to allow oneself all foods (i am doing all RAW foods) in order to be more at peace with food and to stop binge eating. I'm seeing that this advice has quite a bit of wisdom behind it. I eat what i want and the binge eating is relieved.

General overeating, on the other hand, is the second thing to tackle. After stopping binge eating, when one dedicates onesself to stopping overeating, that's where the permanent weight loss would come into play.

This is a slow process. I usually do the temporary quick fix of dieting. This feels scary at times when i overdo it overeating, and i question myself what the hell i'm doing off of a diet and feel so discouraged about how i look, but sometimes, like this morning, not dieting feels liberating. I enjoyed a good time with friends last night, enjoyed the food, and didn't come home and binge!!!

That's a happy new year!

xoxoxo michelle joy

Struggles and Stresses...and Good Things, too

Hiya Folks,

So, Cliff and I are about 2 weeks raw now.

It's been a struggle at some points, and at other times, easy and like it always used to be.

The last few days, however, I've been in a kind of awful place emotionally, stressed, due to finances. I feel like i work so hard, but the work I do doesn't pay me. I can barely pay my bills this month.

Last month when i was binge eating, buying pizza and chinese meals daily on my debit card, i never thought of how it would impact me. It must have totaled a few hundred. And now i'm suffering because i spent that money, that i need now to pay my bills. In the heat of the binges, i felt rich. But, i wasn't.

Somehow, it feels like eating pizza and eggrolls again will make this woe all dissappear. The urgest for cooked food have been quite strong at some points, but thank god, i've verbalized them, and it's taken the energy out of them.

Cliff is also ultra supportive. The moment i say i feel like going out to get pizza on the drive to my mother's house, he insists on driving me himself instead. God bless him.

Cliff is struggling with eating cooked at times, too. Strong emotions and pain can make us want to run away into cooked. Cliff threw his back out and was in considerable pain. Later in the day, I was about to make him one of our raw platters and called all over the house for him. Well, I found him upstairs in our 2nd kitchen where all of the illegal cooked food got stowed, eating a bologna sandwhich.

He's been back to eating raw breakfast and enjoyed a raw lunch today, so that's wonderful. He's not throwing out the baby with the bath water. A minor blip.

Today, I was out all day and i left him plenty of raw food and directions on how to put things together, but i'll soon find out how he coped when he comes to pick me up.

I'm mostly upset about gaining weight and how I look, but i know it's also my financial situation that is depressing me. So, the heavy heart i have is not all about how i look, but it's contributing.

And it used to be so easy to just do 80-10-10 for a few weeks, like i did to prepare for my Halloween performance as I KNOW i can drop 20 lbs easily by doing that.

But, something keeps telling me that that's not the way to go. That i simply need to control my portions. Listen more to hunger and fullness signals. Everytime i diet to lose fast, i gain it right back anyway.

I'm scared to weigh myself.

Anyway, if i want to lose weight, i keep telling myself to walk more. But it's absolutely frigid out here in Philadelphia, and i never tire of finding excuses not to go to the gym. I was so on a roll this summer with the exercise. What a blessing that was, to just be on FIRE to exercise daily and walk up those hills of Manayunk, supremely contented.

Now, i've been walking a bit here and there, but not the 1hour+ walks i was doing.

I'm so depressed about being heavier, but feel helpless in a way. I know i overeat and knowing that depresses me, too. I'm watching myself do it. And i know i'm heavier and shouldn't overeat, but yet, i do.

And I'm depressed because i have barely any income coming in.

I called an opera cafe in Phila where the waiters/waitresses all sing opera to get a job there. They asked for my resume and headshot, which i promptly sent. When they phoned me after that inquiring about my availability, i was excited, but got cold feet. I was binge eating on cooked at the time and couldn't see myself resisting the pasta and bread and butter there. I let two weeks go by without returing their call. Now, i've called at least 3x, and no one has returned my call yet. At least if i worked there a few nights a week, i'd make tips.

The catering does not pay. By the time you add up all of the hours and hours of labor that go into making catering trays, we probably average $2/hour.

I feel like so work sooo hard. For so little.

Last night, i finally got fed up. I said a prayer to God, to the universe, working the secret. I said, "I want to be paid to sing. I want a nice renovated house. I want a good income." I went on and on like this. I think this is what i am going to have to keep doing daily, because this cloud over my head is just making me feel awful.

Another stress/blessing has been preparing two new classes i am going to be leading at Arnolds Way. I know they will be good for me and a blessing to others, but to prepare for them is, you know, challenging.

The one class, "12 Steps To Raw" is ever on my mind, which is turning out to be a good thing. I almost heated up some Fuhrman lentil soup yesterday that i had in the freezer, until it popped into my mind that i have to be an example to my students. I put the soup back in the freezer. I should move that soup up to the freezer upstairs.

I've also been planning what i will demonstrate in my "Raw Food Masterclass with Chef Michelle" class. That was stressing me out as well. I've made the plan, and now i'm not happy with it, which is stressing me out, too!

I'm just venting, and i'm sure the classes will work out just fine.

If you are interested and would like to join me at Arnolds Way for these classes, here is the info:

RAW FOOD MASTERCLASS: Arnolds Way, 4 Thursdays from 6:30-8pm beginning Thurs, Jan 7th - Demonstrations of smoothies, salads, desserts, wraps, with an emphasis on how to reuse leftovers.

12 STEPS TO RAW: Arnolds Way, 4 Fridays from 6:30-8pm beginning Friday, Jan 8th - Lecture, handouts, discussion and support on getting and staying raw. Topics include traveling raw, avoiding temptation, different raw diets and finding what works for you, garnering support, creating a raw kitchen.

xoxox michelle joy

Raw On The Road - Picnic In The Car!

Hiya Folks,

Yesterday Cliff and I went out shopping in the rain. Here we are in the car. This is how raw foodists go out for a day of shopping...you have raw picnic in the car!!!!




On the way to the ZERNS Farmer's Market in Gilbertsville, PA.



My black sparkle sequin hat drew such attention at the market, by the way. An older gentleman dressed so dapper came up to me and said, "That hat beautifies you!" That certainly brought a smile to my face :-))



Okay, here is the soft blue igloo we often use to travel for daytrips. Inside we put those blue ice packs to keep everything cold. I always try to bring an assortment of goodies and we eat what we are hungry for. Inside this bag, we had several green smoothies, crudite with dip, apple pie, dehydrated mexican snacks, trail mix, grapes, forks/knives/plates/napkins, cabbage slaw. Enough for lunch and several snacks!



My main man, Cliff, and moi.

Green smoothies are great to travel with. Just pop a few jars of the elixer into your igloo with icepacks and you're ready for a quick meal on the road. This smoothie was delish. It was made from 2 bananas, romaine lettuce, mango, strawberries and agave. Yum.

This picture looks gross, like some kind of frozen ground beef or something, sorry for ooking your out, but i can assure you, it is not raw meat, but a double peice of scrumptious raw apple pie. One of the best pies i ever made. It got better and better after a few days. The brown top is shredded apple and pear seasoned with cinnamon, nutmeg, lemon juice and zest. The middle section was a vanilla cashew cream, and below, a scrumptious pecan date crust.

Here is what is left in a plastic container after we ate several of these little dehydrated goodies. I made a mexican nutspread and spread it on zucchini and eggplant and topped with tomato and dehydrated for a day. Yummo! Cliff loved these.

Cliff loves crunchy celery so i like to have that available for him. And he enjoys a carrot stick every now and again.

Tip: It's so useful to have a wonderful dip in the fridge, and to keep these little 2 oz to go containers with lids on hand. Fill 'er up with a wonderful gingery/garlicy spread and oila', snack city.

We filled the celery crevice with this thai dip and was that yum or what?

Okay, a view of how we do this. I bring plates and forks and everything in plastic containers. On the right was an awesome cabbage slaw i made days earlier. Cabbage lets off alot of water, so i thought the 2 day salad was ruined, but i just squoze out all of the juice and dressing and was left with a dry marinated cabbage slaw that was super super tasty and low fat. We really enjoyed this. There's the green smoothie towards the left and the pie we dug into for mid afternoon snack, later on.

Okay, there's my Cliffy showing you how it's done! Carrot in one hand, plate and fork and cabbage slaw in the other. Satisfying, filling. No need for McDonalds.

Really, there is NEVER an excuse for not eating raw. It just takes EFFORT to prepare and have food ALWAYS on hand. NEVER leave the house empty-handed, otherwise you face temptation.

I am also a firm believer in seasoning food well. When raw food tastes good, it is not only good for you, but delights the taste buds and keeps you interested. Don't eat the same thing everyday or you'll get bored. Mix it up. Homemade food does take effort, but you have to have your priorities in order. It IS easier to drop a box of pasta into boiling water than to shred cabbage and veggies and devise an interesting sauce. Yes, it takes more effort, but, the payoff is better. Homemade food is SO much better for you.

And creates memories that last. Cliff and i have the fondest memories of eating avocado wraps in the winter by the Lucy Elephant Statue down the shore, and at another date, the same meal in the winter on the beach. It creates memories, creates intimacy, creates and sustains health. Go out today and get an igloo or an igloo bag and some blue ice packs.

How do YOU cope with being out? Do you pack? Or have a favorite place you eat at? Let's hear from you!

xoxoxo michelle joy